When Throwing a Fit Just Won't Do...

This week, I was met with some measure of disappointment. Something did not go the way that I had expected. It cost me, literally, and I had to decide how I was going to process this life lesson but not without a word from my emotional sponsors first.

While praying and crying it out simultaneously, I discovered the truth being spoken aloud from a place inside of me that was not shy about being exposed. The truth said: “I’m hurt behind this…that’s what I really feel, taken advantage of.” Once I heard truth with my own ears, I was able to accept that these words were in fact correct. You see, I had an expectation which was not met, actually, it seemed as though it was ignored and since this expectation involved another person, my disappointment doubled. When I addressed the other party and no real closure came from the situation, I then became hurt, but anger, my old friend, stood in front of hurt and decided to handle my dilemma for me.

After a few hours of anger saying the same old things and responding the same old ways, compassion and forgiveness began to nudge their way from the back of the room to have a word with me. They were quite convincing but anger managed to stand off to the side leering at me as if to say: “Come on you can’t let them off that easy!” Just as I leaned in a bit to read angers lips, truth put his firm hand on my shoulder and said these words: “ you've made mistakes too, for which you've been forgiven, what do  you say to extending the same forgiveness?” “But I've changed!” I reasoned and it’s the principle of the thing!” I knew that deep inside I couldn't hold on to that stance forever, so I decided to will to forgive, until I could truly forgive. Willing to forgive is like forgiving on credit until you have enough compassion and conviction to actually obtain forgiveness and use it. I will to forgive often; it’s my revolving credit account…

Later, when I went to take attendance to see who was still lodging in my emotional residence, I found that truth, compassion and forgiveness decided to stay and encourage each other. Every once in a while I could still hear the faint sound of anger’s distant footsteps out in the cold wandering around in the dark. I realized that he was not banished forever but in order for him to return, he had to promise to listen to the majority and confer with them before acting further on the situation. By morning, anger was willing to comply.

The whole of it is, people will disappoint us, take advantage of us and maybe even leave us feeling hurt. All emotions are honest but not all of them can govern our reaction if we want God to intervene and move on our behalf. After all of these years, I finally realize that God can turn any situation around for my good if I simply concede to handle it His way…